I open my eyes and see light filtering through the shades. It triggers a memory of my grandmothers house for some reason and those fun summers when things were normal. It feels warm and nice. Yet foreign.
It startles me. I sit up abruptly. Wait, it's morning?! And I'm waking up without being soaked in sweat?!
I pull my legs around and sit up. I haven't woken up without a nightmare in weeks or is it months now, well since the incident anyway. Time just blends together now. I'm not used to waking up when its light out. Usually I'm up before any hint of the day, not wanting to try to get through another nightmare after reliving those horrific events over and over and over again like some cruel version of Groundhog Day.
It's Saturday. One of the rough days. I do my best to fill it up with as much as possible so I don't have free time to think. Luckily Dr. Levesque helps and sees me for a couple hours on Saturday, so that fill some time. Then I'm usually doing some work, grocery shopping, and any other errands I can use to fill the day until Sunday. Sundays are the best. Those are long run training days, so I can burn a lot of time.
I get up and feel sore. Last nights events start to surface. Oh man, Lauren.
Alarmed I grab my phone - I have to check up on her.
One unread message. From Lauren. She knows me well.
Lil - Daniel gave me a ride home. Safe & sound. Let's grab lunch Sunday. So much to tell u! xoxo
Well, that's good. She's apparently not mad at me. Lunch Sunday will give me something to do after my run, break up the day. I text her back.
Sounds good. Usual place?
I don't have to wait for an answer. Lauren always goes to the same place in town. I head to my closet to grab some clothes so I can get ready for my appointment with Dr. Levesque. Since it's only a mile or two away, I decide I'll run over there today - will help burn some more time. I quickly shower and get ready.
****
The run to the good doctors office is nice. Warms me up and clears my thoughts. That's always a good thing before our sessions. I arrive at the brick building in the town center, hesistate at the door briefly to compose myself and then head in.
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